Quarantine Humor – A Compilation

Yesterday, I took a long walk around the neighborhood & it was so sad that I’ve decided there’s really nothing out there for me until the current state of affairs is over.
I’m heartbroken for my city of Philadelphia, my country & the world 😢

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A post shared by Alya Ibadov Sherman (@alyabuzz)

Ever the optimist, I know that we will get through this & quarantine humor compilations like these certainly prove that we haven’t lost our LOLs -Enjoy!

I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I’m cracking a safe.

I need to practise social-distancing from the refrigerator.

Still haven’t decided where to go for Easter/Passover —– The Living Room or The Bedroom.

PSA: every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom. I try & do this every Monday. It’s scary but it helps.

Homeschooling is going well. 2 students suspended for fighting and 1 teacher fired for drinking on the job.

I don’t think anyone expected that when we changed the clocks we’d go from Standard Time to the Twilight Zone

This morning I saw a neighbour talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her. I came into my house, told my dog….. we laughed a lot.

So, after this quarantine…..will the producers of My 600 Pound Life just find me or do I find them?

Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called THE KITCHEN. You have to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal. I have no clue how this place is still in business.

My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I pee it cleans the toilet.

Day 5 of Homeschooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb threat.

I’m so excited — it’s time to take out the garbage. What should I wear?

I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to Puerto Backyarda. I’m getting tired of Los Livingroom.

Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.

https://twitter.com/i/status/1239523796542992387

Day 6 of Homeschooling: My child just said “I hope I don’t have the same teacher next year”…. I’m offended.

Better 6 feet apart than 6 feet under.

Not mine….kudos to the person/people who wrote it!